Chastity Office 203
I went to an All Addictions Anonymous meeting tonight…3/9/2023
I noticed their numbers were down 50%.
I went to PrayerCall immediately after and noticed our numbers were up 50%.
I believe that is because we have been emphasizing a fairly unique strength, and offering something out of the ordinary…an emphasis on the value of Chastity.
We will always be small because of this…but as Gandhi said “ It is the highest goal, and it is no wonder that the highest effort should be necessary to attain it”.
We are not making monks or priests, here. Just men who can say “No’ and make it stick…with God’s help.
Chastity Office 204
For three weeks I have been attending “Anon” fellowships online throughout the day.
Anon fellowships are for “Friends and family members of addicts”.
They have a wonderful tool to disengage when there is conflict between two people …”Detaching with Love”
So…I had stopped sending videos of me and my son having fun, to my wife, each day.
And…I had stopped buying special foods for dinner for the three of us when my wife comes home from work.
It has, in fact, fostered some more independence between my wife and myself, but…
Four days ago my son began acting out with aggressive behaviors in school with his teachers and friends, at home and with his babysitter.
My son is a little lightening rod, a weather vane of the precise emotional temperature in a room (as all children are), and he perceives this detachment as” iciness “…and he is angry.
Like it or not, my son is happiest when he is with me and his mother…at the same time, in the same space.
I am grateful that chastity has given me sensitivity to my son’s moods and given me the strength to act courageously and lovingly.
…Guess it’s back to daily videos and choice dinners.
Chastity Office 205
HP,
Help me continue to fully embrace your will of Chastity, just for today, through humility and obedience…
And then…Be of unselfish service to my son.
Chastity Office 206
“Repent and Live”
I repented of my sexual “sin “.
But before I could do what I thought was “ Living “, I had to spend 9 months trying keep my wife…so that my son would have his mother.
It was like a two inch diameter, 6 foot iron rod, heated to 500 degrees Fahrenheit, jammed down my throat, and twisted, hard and fast, every day, all day, for 9 months.
Now, our relationship is much more like college roommates, than a marriage…but, it feels reasonably stable and it could not have been done without the clarity of chastity.
Chastity Office 207
People ask me why I stay in this marriage…Here’s why:
Man: “My wife thinks she's a chicken.”
Dr. “Why don’t you get her some help?”
Man: “We need the eggs”.
Lighten up, boys…
Chastity Office 208
“The age of miracles is still with us. Our own recovery proves that.” ...Big Book Page 153
I am going to give a shout-out to two folks:
First, MJ, beloved and known by us as “The Prior”, has 21 months of stone-cold chastity.
And little ole me…has 13 months of chastity.
When the Prior and I met 23 years ago we were not doing nearly so well.
So, if we can do it…anyone can do it!
Chastity Office 209
“Security based on our own belief in ourselves, in our ability not only to cope and survive, but to celebrate life is the only security that lasts. As hard as it may be for adult children to learn they can trust themselves, it still is the only lasting security.”
I prayed all day today…Gently, positively and acceptingly, as a loving father would to a child:
You are chaste, doing a fabulous job, love Gummy, are deeply prayerful, unselfish and self-nurturant, forgiving, do a lot of breath prayer, grow lots of fresh greens, have Gummy in a good school, are strong, endurant and boundaried, smart, healthy, sexually sober, can run 10 miles in the desert, are thin, emotionally available for Gummy, have a positive, grateful attitude, have found God through service, have found yourself through writing, have found your soul…and you and Gummy have fun!
God wants me to love myself…like there was no one else to do it.
Chastity Office 210
One of my favorite lines:
“Choose celibacy or choose marriage…you will be sure to repent”, LOL
Socrates