Loving Offices 1
I know God loves me…cause he gave me you
Steve D.
"The hardest thing in being in a relationship is to being true to yourself and faithful to the other"...and that is where the ultimate spiritual experience is, is in that struggle
Patrick Carnes on Carl Jung
Loving Offices 2
In seeking to salvage a long term relationship we desperately ask for “Knowledge of your will for us and the power to carry it out”
Wouldn’t it be wiser to ask earlier, perhaps even before I begin to pursue a new relationship?
You know, just kinda ‘checkin’ in’ with God?
Just sayin’...
Loving Offices 3
It is a spiritual axiom that anytime we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us.
If someone hurts us and we are sore, we are in the wrong also.
AA 12x12 p.90
How can this truth be used to help have a better relationship?
First, if you were abused by someone, as a child, this is not true.
This truth is true for adults, only, with free will.
If my partner hurts me, through her words, and I am sore, I am wrong.
Why? Because, unless someone is totally evil, they are wounded children themselves and acting in ways that they themselves learned as children.
When I am hurt by my partner’s behavior I need to do something contrary to good, healthy 12 step thought:
…I need to “Take my partner’s inventory”.
Is she feeling hurt?
Is she acting from an adult place?
From that wizened perspective, I have the opportunity to act compassionately.
Without that, I just react to her childhood abuse with my own learned childhood behavior.
And we just lie there in the mud, throwing at each other, as hard as we can…until someone gets hurt enough to stop .
HP, give me the strength to act compassionately towards my partner.
HP, give me the strength to act compassionately towards other people.
HP, give me the strength to act compassionately towards myself.